So I Lie - 2/14/07

I’d tell you what you want to hear
but it wouldn’t be the truth
“honestly,” you say
I’m honest and you cry
. so I lie
. about where I was last night
. and how I spend my time
. and the thoughts inside my mind
I tell you what you want to hear
though its never how I feel
my whole life is a lie for you
cause I can’t tell you the truth
cause you just won’t hear the truth

jump inside my mind - 1/28/07

jump inside my mind
discover all my lies
see my secrets hidden
it’s the truth of what’s inside
my mind is under lock and key
look inside the book
that is my mind and see
what all there is to see
about me

I tried to be a good girl - 1/16/07

I tried to be a good girl
its you I tried to please
I tried to make you happy
now I fall down on my knees
you want me to be like you
I tried my best to be
I know I disappoint you
you don’t know this isn’t me
I tried to make you love me
but this is just too hard
I’m scared to make you hate me
this time I’ve gone too far
you still don’t know my secret
but I know you see my lies
I know you’ll always love me
it makes me want to die

Swear I'm better now - 12/7/06

Swear I’m better now
No more tears to cry
Swear I’ll never leave
I’ll never say goodbye

Pain inside can no more bear
Tears of love unknown, unshed

Swear that I’m okay
I cannot feel the pain
Swear it’s not a lie
I’ll never lie again

Fingers crossed, believe my lie
Ignore the tears behind my eyes

Swear that I am fine
No more blood to shed
Swear that I’m alive
Inside, I know I’m dead

Help me to survive my lie
Please, don’t leave me here to die